G.I. Joe: Retaliation Rated: PG-13

Cat Says:

Ok, so sort of a disclaimer here. I went to go see the first GI Joe and, honestly, except for one small snipet of the movie, I don't remember it. So I'm going to go out on a limb here and say I didn't really like the first one but didn't hate it either. Just Meh. But today I went to go see the new one because my husband, who did like the first one, wanted to go see it. Yup...Major Wife Points here. So keep in mind, one of us is Meh and one of us is YEA going into this movie for this review.

Sadly, we both agreed that this was another Meh movie production. He was disappointed because the film didn't stick to a Comic Book feel or an Action Flick feel, it was wishy washy on both sides. But let me give you the low down on the story first and then I will give you my reasoning for my score.

So the film opens with the squad successfully completing a mission together and then some family time with Roadblock's family. Then they go on another mission and all hell breaks loose. Cobra rears it's ugly head, the Joe's are betrayed and now they are out on their own to bring Cobra down and, yes, save the world. 

Unfortunately there are way too many "Oh Please" moments in this film to make it enjoyable. For instance, one scene where Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow face off, Snake Eyes has an Uzi in his hand while Storm Shadow has ninja stars. He throws one and Snake Eyes uses a repeating burst to shoot it out of the air...not to shoot Storm Shadow, just the star. Thus giving Storm Shadow time to not just throw one more star but 3, then 5, as Snake Eyes shoots them out of the air...without taking out Storm Shadow with the Uzi! OH PLEASE! There are many many moments like this that totally take away from the action.

However there are some good things about this movie too. The hand to hand combat is well done. The special effects are believable. And the Rock and Bruce Willis are...well...The Rock and Bruce Willis doing what they do best...being tough guys with the smart ass lines. 

We both left the theater in total agreement. This is 6 out of 10. Not quite crash and burn but mighty close.

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Do NOT read unless you want a major detail to be spoiled for you...

Channing Tatum, as Duke which is the main character in G.I. Joe, has very little time in this movie. He's in the first mission scene, he's in the family time scene at Roadblock's house but then he's one of the crew killed off when they are attacked on the second mission. Ok, ok, they didn't show a body but they ended the movie letting you believe that he's dead. For the Comic Book fan this was truly a betrayal of the franchise. You don't make a Batman movie and kill off Batman, or a James Bond and kill off Bond. Apparently you also don't make a G.I. Joe and kill off Duke. So I think from that moment, which was about 30 minutes into the movie, it was a lost cause for my husband. Since I didn't realize the significance of this I lasted about 15 minutes longer before the Oh Please thoughts were piling up too high even for me. I don't know if Tatum is just too big of a star now or had other commitments or what the deal was but "the fan" wasn't happy with the demise of the main character. Apparently this was a good 2 points off the score he gave for this review. So there you have it...you have been warned.

Nate Says:

(Guest blogger for Tory)

I went with my wife to see GI Joe: Retaliation at the drive-ins.  The plot picks up where the first movie left off with the Joes seeming victory leaving them free to work other missions while the remnants of Cobra plan their payback in the shadows. 

There are very large changes in the cast that I fail to understand.  The first movie introduces core characters but there were many more that could have been drawn upon for a second movie.  In an odd twist, many characters do not return and no reason is given while a paltry few are added, and one killed early on.  There is also the pet peeve I have about a character should be played by the same actor, particularly when it is a primary one, in this case Cobra Commander.  Be that as it may, by any measure this movie falls short of the first one.  There is a good amount of action as one would expect from the trailers and the previous installment and these are the high points although the action at times is a bit contrived as is much of the comedy they attempted. 

Zartan is by far my favorite character in this movie as he at least attempts to bring some dimension and flair to being the bad guy.  The scene at the summit is as close to the admixture of action/comedy/suspense that I had hoped would be brought to this film, particularly since its release was delayed and I cannot see any level of polish anywhere in the movie that would require such a change in schedule. 

In summary:  Explosions-check, Evil Plots-check, acting-fair, storyline-mediocre, casting-what???  If a third movie is in the works, please expand your character pool for both sides, I wouldn’t say no to Serpentor as an antagonist if just to mix things up.  Also, if you can’t make the comedy work in the action don’t force it, just blow more stuff up.  It’s nicer than straining your writers and the viewers patience.  A 5 out of 10 experience.